Monday, February 14, 2005

hot teen sex

what is that? a pretty and unique mold growth? an ultra-complex molecular model? or is it a piece from a hot new local artist? none of the above! it's purportedly the first teen sex map. ripped out of the pages of time magazine, the accompanying article goes on to vaguely describe what they thot they were doing when they were carrying out the survey ("The majority probably involved an 'exchange of fluids,' say the authors," yeah, what exactly does THAT mean?). they found that half the 1000-kid school were "sexually active" and that the average loss-of-virginity age was 15 and a half. "shocked?" they ask. not really. that sounds about rite from what i remember from that distant thing called high school. they're distressed about this because the spread of disease in a network like this would read far and wide. 1% of the relationships were homosexual (you see jake and his "bisexual" friend aaron in the upper rite hand corner?), tho it should be 2.5%, according to the national figure. the funniest part of the whole thing is that the takers of the survey thot that since "there was no incentive to lie," that the kids didn't lie. yeah, rite. i'm not convinced that player matt (he's in the upper rite hand quadrant) is really as prolific as he claims to be. as probably inaccurate as it is, it does give us a better glimpse into the sex lives of the underaged. (happy valentine's day!)

in other news, another mother-to-be is attacked by a crazy woman who wants to cut the baby out of the pregnant woman and keep the baby as her own. i don't want to jump the gun and call this a trend, but this is the second time in not too long that we've heard this exact same story. one lunatic tells everyone she knos that she is having a baby, setting up a nursery for the imaginary baby, and then when the time comes, she goes out in search of a baby with her knife in hand. luckily for the mother this time, she fought back and ended up killing the crazy woman. rite on, sarah, rite on! this'll make you think twice about being pregnant in the company of batshit strangers. what kind of world are we living in!?

another story about the dangers of blogging. beware! i just like being called an "affluent young adult." i like the word affluent.

the best news of the week so far comes via vividblurry. the release of the first season of clarissa explains it all on dvd in may. i watched a lot of television when i was younger, and clarissa was one of the best shows on tv at the time. who doesn't like melissa joan hart? i mean, when she's not being a teenage witch or whatever. or course, i don't see why they didn't do a salute your shorts dvd first. pinsky was a total dreamboat and is now part of rilo kiley. (and for that matter, where are our are you afraid of the dark discs?)

oh my god i couldn't get tickets to the killers at the moore! the tix went on sale on saturday and by the time i went to the box office on monday, they were all gone! suck! i hate scalpers and all the rest of the people who grabbed up tickets like hungry hungry hippos! if anyone knos where i can obtain killers tickets at a reasonable price, lemme kno... i don't want to miss my brandon!

i watched ray last week, and i have to say, it's pretty good. jamie foxx did a really good job, and so did everyone else (except for maybe kerry washington, who played della bea, ray's wife. not that it was bad, but i was just unconvinced). the music was naturally fantastic and the visuals were quite watchable. while i never really feel like biopics should ever work well as a story, the filmmakers really pulled it off anyways. if you haven't watched it yet, then perhaps you should make your way to the theater and give it a look (or rent it on dvd).

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